And so this is my traditional Daily Nigger formal Fourth of July article. It’s kind of a ‘fuck you’ really to the British, who went around the whole goddam world making trouble for people. Hell, they did such an awful job at colonizing that there were revolutions going on practically on every continent because of what those bastards did. And so this, ladies and gentlemen, is my ‘fuck the British’ article.
Here in America we don’t always try to outsmart people in order to get what we want. Here in America we sometimes create an industry out of stupidity in order to gain an advantage over others. You see, this is what happens when people have to throw a bunch of bums out like the British. They turn into complete and utter fighters and sworn revolutionaries forever.
Wherever Americans go in this world, you can always tell them apart from everyone else. And the reason is because they are usually fatter than the locals and they have a very loud mouth that they use quite often. Americans just absolutely have to have someone’s attention at all times. Hell, it’s gotten so bad that entire mega-media empires have sprung up and sunk their long tentacles into the government and produced a show called America. It’s the story about a piece of paper that drives everybody crazy called the Constitution. We fight for it and die for it. We live and breath and live it on our sleeves. It is our birthright, and we are always at war it seems fighting for it.
America is as biblical a story as you can get. Actually, if you think about it so what if Obama lied about being a Christian and is a Muslim after all. He seems more like an atheist to me. I don’t know if he really believes in God at all to be honest with you. Hell, he adores his mother and everybody knows that she was an atheist. It’s just that in a crude way he represents the antithesis of the American story, and yet it is the American story at the same time.
To us here at The Daily Nigger’s corporate headquarters located just up the gravel road and to the right off of the river road by the levee, we believe that it really should not matter what someone believes to be an American. In fact, the whole premise of this country was founded upon that principle. And here we have the most fundamental building block of our national identity being called into question because perhaps it goes to the very beginnings of America long before there was a government in place.
The act of breaking away from the British is the culmination of a sentiment that grew over time to become known familiarly as political correctness. In the process of building a nation on the premise of freedom one cannot simply stop and say their job is complete. Freedom is a work in process, and the arguments going on today sound eerily reminiscent of a time long ago when little pieces of paper were circulated to disseminate the news. Now it is the blogosphere that is the ‘didja hear’ town crier. The blogs lit up when Obama gave the Queen of England an i-Pod, and for a moment there I was on the fence about the matter.
I probably would have given her a framed map of the world showing all of her majesty’s former colonies. And then maybe I would have politely reminded her majesty that we still can’t really claim to have gotten over our submission to the crown. But the fact is, Obama has made it clear that he doesn’t really relate to that part of American history. It seems that to him American history began some time during the Civil War. Although his mother was not black, he nevertheless chose to be called a black man.
Frankly, none of us here give a damn what color Obama is or is not in any given circumstance. And none of us here care one iota whether he is a Christian, a Muslim, or an atheist. But what we do have a problem with Obama is over his ability to lie about loving all of America. In order to love America properly you have to both insult the British and compliment them at the same time. You have to not only tell them that you threw them out, but you have to show them that you have accomplished something far better than them. Obama, however, has chosen to emulate the British rather than lead America with something revolutionary and peculiarly American.
Suddenly we all supposed to “join the rest of the world”, i.e., Europe, or else we just don’t understand that others’ ideas in this world are better than our own. In particular, this includes the British, who have already tried socialized medicine and have dabbled in the kinds of alternative energy that we are now asked to consider legislating into action. The one and only one originally America response to all of this is hell no. We are going to do this our way, not the way everyone else does it but our way, the American way.
I tried my best to like Obama when he insulted the Queen, because it is a tradition to do so. But he did so by also returning to America and putting into action plans to turn America into a British model that has already run its course decades ago. It is as though Obama is reaching back in time before the Civil War in a mad dash to piece together for himself what it really means to be an American. In the process of doing so he is erecting the very structure which was demolished long ago and replaced by something far better.
All we can say is, God help us all if he tries to pull down American back to those days when we still had to apologize to others. What Obama does not seem to understand is that most Americans are educated enough to understand the history of their country in its entirety and can grasp its entire course. To not know what it is to be an American is probably worse than being a bad American who knows better. Maybe that’s what has us so pissed off here about Obama, which is that his ideas really aren’t anything new for those who know the truth. To truly be daring and take risks and provide leadership at the same time requires one to be completely comfortable with the past. We just don’t get that feeling from this guy.
But the bottom line is that America will keep on going despite all of this. What is going on right now is a big drama: Obama vs. The World; Can America Survive? We are traveling back into our history because he is dragging us there. If this helps him understand why he insulted the Queen, then fine. But frankly, he is so fascinated with the British right now that it makes one wonder if he really meant to insult her at all. Maybe he just didn’t know how to tell her that in so many words by giving her an i-Pod he is saying that America will trade its cutting edge technology and innovation in return for her country’s dilapidated system.
These are frustrating times because of the person who occupies the Oval Office. This is a drama like none ever before. Obama has proven that he does not understand America well enough in the way he turned his back on the Iranian protesters and scolded Israel. It shows his complete ignorance of the American way of promoting freedom, not repressing it in order to appear unbiased. On this July the 4th we should be prouder than ever to be an American, because we are standing up for what America believes in from start to finish. We have studied it and gone abroad and mingled with foreigners here. We are always trying to fit the American template into the world because it is forever changing.
America is moving forward regardless of whether Obama wants to go there or not. America will not regress backward and use old ideas. It just isn’t the way business is conducted here. We might flaunt our stupidity, but it is our collective conscience and not our collective wealth which provides a path toward the future. None of us has a crystal ball, but seeing the future isn’t the point. The point of being American is about understanding the future and communicating it within the context of the past. This is the responsibility of those who cling to the ideals of many as opposed to the ideas of a few. It is downright American to examine political leaders because they should always be told that their ideas are no better than ours, and their job is merely to set an example for everyone else. And this is not a monarchy, and it never will be as long as the truth is able to be told which right now it is. Of course there is an equal amount of garbage out there too. At least maybe on the 4th we can just take a rest from this discussion for a moment and just think about it instead.
-TDN


































